Archive for the ‘Dumb Customers’ Category

1PM System Overload

CSR on phone: Help desk, this is James*.
[pause] CSR: I am sorry, this is the PC and phone help desk. Sounds like you need the facilities help desk if a toilet is stopped up.
[pause] CSR: Okay sir, I understand, but you need facilites, not the help desk.
[long pause] CSR: Okay, is it a Windows toilet or a Unix toilet?
Customer, now on speakerphone: Well, there are no windows in this bathroom, so I guess it must be a Unix toilet.
CSR: Okay, I will get a Unix toilet specialist there as soon as we can. Which building and bathroom is it?
[pause] CSR: Thanks.
[CSR hangs up] CSR back on phone: Hello, facilities? This is James at the PC help desk. Yeah, I have a doozy for you…try not to laugh…

730 International Parkway
Richardson, Texas

Overheard by: El Gee

A Career in Bioethics Is Waiting for You!

Auto salesman: When are you due?
Young woman: Two weeks. I can’t wait for this to be over.
Auto salesman: This is just the beginning! The baby is much more work.
Young woman: No, I mean, I can’t wait to not be such a fatass. I hate fat people.
Auto salesman: Uh-huh.
Young woman: Can you imagine how many people get abortions because they don’t want to be fat?
Auto salesman, after long pause: I can honestly say that no, I cannot imagine that.

Boston, Massachusetts

Overheard by: Purely horrified

Like All the Terrorists Have Agreed to Do

Older gentleman at counter: So, if my application is approved for the remote entry program, I can enter the U.S. after hours?
Customs officer: Yes, sir.
Older gentleman: But what’s with this border passport requirement?
Customs officer, uncomfortable: The remote entry pass is for when the port is closed, sir. You will still need a passport to enter when we are open.

Customs office, Northern Border