Archive for the ‘Dumb Bosses’ Category

12PM Order 10 More “Gigabytes” (?)

Boss: Do you know where the gigabytes are? I need some more for my computer.
Employee #1: What are you talking about?
Boss: Are they in the closet?

He goes looking in the closet for about five minutes.

Boss: Seriously, do you know where more gigabytes are?
Employee #2: Maybe they’re in your pants.

N59W14909 Bobolink Avenue
Menomonee Falls, Wisconsin

Overheard by: LeeAnn Michaud

11AM EOY Staff Meeting

Manager: We’re all sharks. Remember, guys.
Employee: Huh? Sharks?
Manager: Yeah, we’re all like sharks. Sharks have to keep moving their whole life or they’ll die. They never stop moving. So keep moving, guys! We’re sharks!
Employee: So basically what you’re saying is that if we stop moving, you’ll kill us all?

208 Chain Lake Drive
Halifax, Nova Scotia
Canadia

Maybe Those Are Actually the Choices Down in Oz

Boss: Can you help me with this Word document? I want to change it so that the layout is horizontal instead of vertical.
Secretary: Okay, go into File, then Page Setup.
Boss: Yep.
Secretary: You see where it says “Page Source”?
Boss: Yep.
Secretary: Okay. Now you see where it says “Orientation”? Make your choice.
Boss: Gay or straight?

525 Collins Street
Melbourne, Victoria
Australia

Overheard by: Captain Pants