Archive for the ‘Drinking’ Category

And I Was Like, “Mis­sion Ac­com­plished!”

Fe­male cowork­er #1: By that time I was drunk enough to run in there my­self. So I bought one of ’em. It was like a reg­u­lar con­dom, but it had these lit­tle pink things…
Fe­male cowork­er #2: You bought a french tick­ler?
Fe­male cowork­er #1: Yeah! So we blew it up at our ta­ble and start­ed us­ing it as a vol­ley­ball. It was re­al­ly fun for a while, and then I spiked it in­to the priest’s head and we were asked to leave the re­cep­tion.

Al­bany, New York

Over­heard by: Dou­bled over Cowork­er

It’s a New Or­leans Thing, Dear Read­er

Op­er­a­tor set­ting up au­to claim with cus­tomer on phone: Sir, I’m so sor­ry your car got stolen to­day. At least you ba­bies and CDs are fine. I think you need to git you some whiskey to calm you down. Or just do what I do to calm my­self down, cheer! “Who dat! Who dat! Who dat! Yayayayayaya! Who dat!”

Ba­ton Rouge, Louisiana

Over­heard by: Wish I had my MP3 play­er to­day