Loner geek, answering phone: The Phoenix rises at 3 pm. (hangs up phone)
Washington, DC
Overheard by: Bec215
Archive for the ‘Dorks, Geeks, & Nerds’ Category
NewsFlash: Canadia’s Economy Mysteriously Falters!
Geeky cashier: How are you pay’n for this?
Guy in a hurry: Cash.
Geeky cashier: Like cash, cash?
Guy in a hurry: What?
Best Buy
Newmarket
Ontario, Canadia
Someone’s Been Sniffing the Toner Again
Receptionist, on his last day: How can I give the rest of the staff access to these files?
Tech guy: Put them on the network.
Receptionist: Where’s the network?
Tech guy: Exactly! It’s everywhere, man!
University of Minnesota, Minneapolis
Overheard by: I’m New Here
Why There Are So Few Mexican Internet Cafes
Cube rat #1: Hey Chris, go install this on Ben’s computer.
Cube rat #2: (lets out audible fart)
Cube rat #1: Never mind.
Cube rat #2: Hey, I’m only getting two bars for my laptop’s Wi-Fi connection.
Cube rat #3: It’s because that damn fart cloud is out blocking the signal!
Columbia, South Carolina
Overheard by: Cube Rat Holding Nose
Chinese Hamster Gynecologists?
Minion: Do you seriously want to go off on a Chinese hamster ovary tangent? I mean, who gives a crap?
1959 NE Pacific Street
Seattle, Washington
Overheard by: snickerpants
Then We Give It to the Clients, and It’s a Happy Ending for Everyone
Data geek #1: Do they massage the data before they give it the clients?
Data geek #2: Oh, we massage it like it’s Kobe beef.
Salt Lake City, Utah
I Never Metameme I Didn’t Like
Internet hipster: It’s a meme of a meme, so it’s meta.
Boss: What?!
Fontana, California
Why Was Jesus Always With the Disciples, Man?
Geek #1: Yeah, I’m pretty good with the chicks these days.
Geek #2: Oh, yeah? How?
Geek #1: I just walk up to them and be like “how you doiiiinn’ ” and I got them.
Geek #2: Then why are you always with me?
SUNY
New Paltz, New York
At a Ren Faire, Definitely
Security guard: This guy comes in with an orange juice bottle of vodka every morning! Gimme a shot of that!
Nerdy office worker: Do you really think I look like an alchie? An alchemist, maybe…
Manhattan, New York
From My Big Book of Rainy Day Activities
Middle-aged project manager: Remember markers?!
Middle-aged web guy: I loved sniffing markers!
Middle-aged project manager: Airplane glue! We had to take my neighbor to the hospital because she got the lid stuck inside her nose from sniffing too hard.
Middle-aged web guy: Haha! I bet that was hard to explain to her parents!
Middle-aged project manager, dreamily: I just sniff paint…
Baltimore, Maryland
Overheard by: Unsurprised Temp
