Her Name Is RuPaul

Client with sick dog: I need to see the veterinarian on duty because my dog isn't feeling well.
Veterinarian receptionist: Is your dog a male or female?
Client with sick dog: She's a male.

Wooster, Ohio

Overheard by: netty

Which Almost Explains the French Maid Uniform

Female patient: I just noticed your ID badge. That’s a great picture of you.
Paramedic: Oh, yeah, thank you. You should see my driver’s license photo. I wore a priest’s outfit for that one.

6500 Excelsior Boulevard
St. Louis Park, Minnesota

Overheard by: Rod Backer

…But Think Of It As an Investment in Your Future.

Doctor, on conference call: I might be teaching you to suck eggs…

Alexandria, Virginia

11AM Cancel Doctor’s Appt.

Mental Health Advisor: He’s crazy. He’s gone off his meds because he thinks the doctors are trying to shrink his penis.

240 Calhoun Street
Cincinnati, Ohio

You Thought the SATs Were Over in High School?

Therapist #1: The client missed 80% of his appointments over the past two months.
Therapist #2: He was supposed to have 80% of his sessions in two months!?

Washoe Valley, Nevada

Patient: Hey! It’s Damn Cold in This Paper Gown

Physician: What can you tell me about this X-ray?
Student: It’s a male pelvis with two fractures.
Physician: It’s shaped like a male pelvis, but it’s not.
Student: How can you tell?
Physician: The lack of a penis outline on the X-ray helps.

Emergency Room, University of Kansas Hospital
Kansas City, Kansas

Overheard by: Stifling the Laugh

…While I Raid Your Sampler Case?

Patient who just failed drug test: I need a note to stay out of work.
Doctor: What do you want me to say? That you're too stoned from taking too many Vicodin to be productive?
Patient: Sure, but would you mind wording it better?

Orlando, Florida

Overheard by: Amazed Nurse

It's Her Secret Shame.

Receptionist #1: Where's Linda today?
Receptionist #2: She's gonna be out for a while, she's having surgery on her thyroid.
Dentist: I didn't even know she had a thyroid.

Bayside, New York

She'll Get Your Good Side, If You Have One

Neurologist: Okay, well, Tim…the bathroom's right around the corner. Why don't you head in there and go as much as you can? Then Carol will come in and take a picture.

Shelbyville, Indiana

Overheard by: Confused at the Neurologist

Even If It Is Very Controversial

Clinic pharmacist to nurse practitioners: Can we please not talk about my vagina anymore today?

Salt Lake City, Utah

Overheard by: It’s not THAT kind of clinic!