PR Male: Why are you sending the reporter these pictures?
PR Female: I’m just trying to hook her.
PR Male: What?
Wilmington, Delaware
Archive for the ‘Delaware’ Category
Office Code for “She’s Under My Desk”
Dude: Do you know where your wife is?
Sarge: How the fuck are you gonna walk in here on a Thursday morning, come in my fucking office, see that I’m in the middle of writing a fucking important letter, and ask me where the fuck someone else in this fucking building is. I’m sorry, where the fuck do you see a babysitter sign on my desk?
Dude: I’m sorry, I just…
Sarge: Where the fuck do you see it? Where’s the fucking sign?
Newark, Delaware
Overheard by: Shaye
We Will Now Move on to “Bitch” as an Interjection
Sarge: Well… you could also use it literally like: “If I fucked your mother. I would be a motherfucker.”
Academy Street
Newark, Delaware
Overheard by: Shaye
But Instead, the Gerbil Was Under Your Desk.
Office supply delivery guy: Well, I was just afraid it was shoved up there and wouldn’t be found.
Receptionist: (silence)
Wilmington, Delaware
Overheard by: olamac
What Happened Next Came As a Surprise to All of Us
Managing editor: Who didn’t have their salad tossed?
Wilmington, Delaware
But Potentially in the Desert
Professor: It’s an island somewhere…probably in the ocean.
University of Delaware
Newark, Delaware
Overheard by: Anne
He’s Getting Divorced, but Close Enough
Cop: Where’s the chief?
Higher-up: He’s out this week. He had surgery on Tuesday.
Cop: Oh, yeah, that’s right. I heard he was having a hysterectomy.
Higher-up: Um, yeah.
Newark, Delaware
Fool Me Once…
Female coworker: Do you have pants on?
Male coworker: What?
Female coworker: Are you wearing pants?
Male coworker: Um… Yes?
Female coworker: Okay, good!
Wilmington, Delaware
Overheard by: Had pants on
Lick Me and You’ll Be Awake All Night
Secretary #1: I have Mountain Dew.
Secretary #2: Excuse me?
Secretary #1: I have Mountain Dew. (pause) My boobs are sweating.
Wilmington, Delaware
After You Finish Crying
Security guy: I could be an officer, you know.
Sarge: Oh, shut the fuck up.
Security guy: No, really. It’s just politics stopping me! Just politics!
Sarge: Oh, is Rudy fucking Giuliani preventing you from becoming a police officer? Why don’t you fucking explain that to all of us?
Public Safety
Newark, Delaware
Overheard by: Shaye
