Boss: Six months ago I was in pajamas with a bong!
W 1st Street
Los Angeles, California
Archive for the ‘Default’ Category
Behind the Flowering Ficus
Patient: Where’s the bathroom?
Receptionist: On your way out, you can just go in that corner.
Dentist’s Office
Ottawa, Ontario
Canadia
Overheard by: Avoiding the corner
The Bitch Promises, but Never Delivers
Federal employee to coworker in ladies’ room: Darlene, how long is a dog pregnant?
L’Enfant Plaza
Washington, DC
Overheard by: Just a contractor
An SOW, an RFP, and Thou Beside Me in the Shipyard
Supervisor to contractor: What can I do to turn you on?
Shipyard
San Diego, California
Overheard by: sarah
Not Even a Mint on the Seat?
Manager leaving toilet stall, to next person in line: Don’t worry — I didn’t leave anything in there.
473 Ridge Road
Dayton, New Jersey
Overheard by: office peon
NewsFlash: Canadia’s Economy Mysteriously Falters!
Geeky cashier: How are you pay’n for this?
Guy in a hurry: Cash.
Geeky cashier: Like cash, cash?
Guy in a hurry: What?
Best Buy
Newmarket
Ontario, Canadia
Okay, Now What Does This “Crittle” Key Do?
Caller: I can’t seem to log into my account.
CS rep: Have you entered your username and password into the login fields?
Caller: Yes, I have.
CS rep: Okay now press the enter key.
Caller: Where’s the enter key?
Earthlink Customer Service
San Jose, California
He Was a Scumbag’s Scumbag
Feisty secretary: Man, could that man spit!
Newcastle, Delaware
Overheard by: What else could he do?
He’s Had the Crisis Penciled in for Years
Bar patron #1: You gonna have another drink?
Bar patron #2: No, I gotta get home before mid-life.
36th Avenue and Arctic Boulevard
Anchorage, Alaska
Overheard by: thinking it was already too late
Drive-Thru Duty at the Bangalore Call Center Is Lonely Work
Delivery lady, on phone: Okay, what can I get for you?
Customer on the other end: I’d like a medium pepperoni pizza with no sauce and a cherry coke.
Lady, typing on a computer: Okay, a medium pizza with no sauce, just plain cheese, is that correct?
Customer: No. With pepperoni. And a cherry coke.
Lady: Pepperoni… [types again] I’m just pushing all the wrong buttons tonight.
Customer: Yeah, I know what you mean.
Lady: It’s one of those days where you just shouldn’t have woken up, you know?
Customer: Uh… yeah.
Lady: At least it’s almost over though, right?
Customer: …right.…
Lady: So you said you wanted a medium pepperoni pizza, with no sauce, a side of ranch, and a cherry coke?
Customer: No side of ranch.
Lady: Awww, but ranch is good for you!
Customer: …no ranch, thank you.
Lady: Fine, goodnight. [hangs up phone]
Hanover, New Hampshire
Overheard by: Will
