Archive for the ‘Customers’ Category

10AM Meeting with Client

Senior Director: Well, I hate to tell you this, but we’re going to be a week late with your report.
Client on speaker: You fuckin’ serious? The fuck you doing over there? Writing this thing in pen? Sanskrit? The fuck, man?
Senior Director: Actually, I’m chipping it away in stone…hey, don’t you worry about how I’m writing this fucking report! You’ll get it in a week. Who the fuck are you to give me an attitude
Client: Fuck you! Hurry the fuck up! We’re paying your ass, so you should be nice to me!
Senior Director: Kiss my ass!…cock eyed fuck! By the way, how is the wife doing?

51 W. 52nd Street
New York, NY

2PM Routine Transaction

Teller: Sir, can you please send in your ID since you want to cash this check

Customer: Well, there’s a problem. I lost my ID, but I can give you my social security number, birthday, and even tell you the last several transactions on my account to verify.

Teller: Ok, what’s your birthday and social?

Customer: [gives information]

Teller: Ok, what were the last three charges on your account?

Customer: [gives information]

Teller: So…what’s this $450 charge Passion Parties?

Customer: [Laughter] Uh, that’s something my wife is involved in.

730 Adkins Boulevard
Jackson, Mississippi

Overheard by: Nathan Best