Client: There are a lot of things you can eat that aren’t food.
Photo studio
Culver City, California
Archive for the ‘Customers’ Category
…Mr. Gigantor
Salesmen on phone with client: I did steroids in college, so I understand where you're coming from.
Plymouth, Massachusetts
No, You’ve Just Got Those Little Wings on Your Lapel
Customer: By chance, was your mom a flight attendant?
Employee: Why, do you think you’re my dad?
Costa Mesa, California
Overheard by: Still laughing now
Her Name Is RuPaul
Client with sick dog: I need to see the veterinarian on duty because my dog isn't feeling well.
Veterinarian receptionist: Is your dog a male or female?
Client with sick dog: She's a male.
Wooster, Ohio
Overheard by: netty
…That's My Job
Customer: Hey, where's my fucking wasabi, bitch?
Sushi girl: I don't think you asked for…
Manager: I don't know. But I can tell you this–it'll be up your fucking arse if your manners don't improve.
Sushi girl: Wanker!
Manager: Don't swear at work.
Adelaide, Australia
Unless You Have an 11?
Woman: I take an exact size 9.
Salesgirl: We only have an 8 and a 10.
Woman: I’ll take the 10.
Niagara-on-the-Lake
Ontario, Canada
Overheard by: bored at work
The TheraFlu Commercial That Was Banned in Louisiana
Customer: I need the cold and flu meds that I have to be logged into a data base for.
Pharmacist: Well, can you tell me your symptoms?
Customer: Well, I'm sore and my head… it's like my whole head is just like… like someone sat on my face… but not in a good way.
(pharmacist gives deadpan face and goes to get meds)
Customer: You know, like a big fat person sat on my face… head. Do you take debit?
Mandeville, Louisiana
Overheard by: ShiftSuper2theSTARS
…Wait, No…Insensitivity?
Customer: It smells like incest in here… Wait, no, incense.
Golf Shop
Macon, Georgia
Overheard by: What do pine-scented candles remind you of?
Yes.
Coworker: Their phone number is 800-pfaucet.
Customer: Is that capitalized?
Chico, California
I Warned You About Poke Salad Annie
Customer #1: I don't know how she thinks she's hot.
Customer #2: Who?
Customer #1: Sweet tits.
Customer #2: (mumbles obscenities)
Customer #1: Well, I don't know what to tell you, you're the one who always dates mean, nasty women.
Target
Evansville, Indiana
Overheard by: REDman