Archive for the ‘Cops’ Category

Tonight on WWE Smack­down: Clash of the Bu­reau­crats!

FBI agent: Ex­cuse me, I’m an in­ves­ti­ga­tor for the FBI. I would like a copy of a stu­den­t’s tran­script.
Reg­is­trar: Ok. You need to pay a $7 tran­script fee.
FBI agent: Uh. I don’t think I need to pay that. I’m an in­ves­ti­ga­tor for the FBI.
Reg­is­trar: Every­body has to pay for a tran­script.
FBI agent: I think I will have to speak to your su­per­vi­sor.
Reg­is­trar: I’m sor­ry, but that’s what the sign says.

John Jay Col­lege of Crim­i­nal Jus­tice, 10th Av­enue
New York, New York

Over­heard by: Wait­ing next in line

Your Grand­ma Al­ways Was a Char­ac­ter

Po­lice­woman: Right. So then I had to search her, and I found a crack pipe shoved some­where that a crack pipe should nev­er be shoved. So I en­tered it in the log, and then I threw it in­to the garbage. Then she said, ‘No, you can’t throw it out. That’s my best one! I’ll nev­er get an­oth­er one like it!‘
Moth­er: Oh my god, hon­ey, how nasty! I don’t like you work­ing in sit­u­a­tions like this.
Po­lice­woman: Well, but my point is this: of course she’ll get it back. Soon as I re­lease her, she’ll just go dig­ging in the trash and find it, and shove it right back where I found it.

Bel­mont Av­enue and Sheri­dan Road
Chica­go, Illi­nois