Office consultant that everyone hates: Once I commit to something I tend to try to do it.
Community Co-op
Newark, New Jersey
Archive for the ‘Consultants’ Category
A Fine Distinction Is Still a Distinction
Over the cube wall: That’s apples and oranges. But the oranges are red.
2nd Avenue
Seattle, Washington
Overheard by: Murray
But If a Cops Film Crew Shows Up, the Shirt Is History
Seminar coordinator: Between keeping my shoes on and keeping my britches on, there’ll be no running from me!
14 Fairfield Drive
Brookfield, Connecticut
Overheard by: Marissa
NewsFlash: UPenn School of Social Work Adopts Controversial ‘Shut Up’ Method, Following Brooklyn’s Lead
Social worker to passing ambulances and police cars: Shut up! God.
260 South Broad Street
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: lora
And Flicking Them at Another Toddler
Photo person cleaning out pump nozzle of green hand sanitizer: This is just like picking boogers out of a toddler!
Prudential Plaza
Chicago, Illinois
It’s the Enemy of Eye-Hand Coordination
Designer: Hey, I’m photoshopping — no spanking!
West 5th Avenue
Vancouver, British Columbia
Canadia
Overheard by: designgrl
Which, by the Way, Don’t Knock Unless You’ve Tried
CSR: Do you know the part number of the item you are looking for?
Customer: It’s C‑S…
CSR: C‑S? As in ‘cat sandwich’?
Braintree, Massachusetts
Borrow Money
Call center rep: Well, what do you do when a random person at a call center says, ‘I love you’?
1440 Broadway
New York, New York
Even If It Does Have a Giant Sunroof
Receptionist on phone: Mom, there are no pictures of them in the paper. I don’t want to live in a decapitated house!
Lincoln Highway
Lancaster, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Assistant Girl
Tupac’s Propaganda Machine, on the Other Hand, Is Alive and Thriving
Counselor: Is that a Tupac T‑shirt? You’re five. Tupac wasn’t alive when you were born. What do you know about Tupac?
Kid: I know the haters killed him.
Counselor: Touché.
Richmond, Virginia
Overheard by: SB
