Who Buys a So­lar-Pow­ered Suit?

Cowork­er to an­oth­er: He was glow­ing like a preg­nant woman!

Man­hat­tan, New York

Over­heard by: net­dpb

Very Nerdy Gay Porno? Dis­cuss.

Gay IT guy: Man, it’s hot in here.
Cowork­er: Yeah, es­pe­cial­ly since you walked in, but we have the heater on.

Ap­ple­ton City, Mis­souri

The Ba­by Boom Seems to Be End­ing With a Whim­per

Sales man­ag­er: Oh, no… I’m not laugh­ing at or­phans, I’m laugh­ing at old de­ment­ed peo­ple.

Ea­gle Street, Bris­bane
Aus­tralia

Over­heard by: Clerk Pe­on

…Un­less That’s the Land­scap­ing Look You’re Go­ing for

Cowork­er on phone: No, you can’t let Stan do that! If he us­es that bull­doz­er in your yard it’ll look like some blind guy with his head be­tween his ass.

Co­lum­bia, New Jer­sey

Best. Coun­ty Fair. Ever.

Cowork­er: It’s like look­ing at live­stock. Bull walks by? Oh, it’s a bull. Cow walks by? Oh, it’s a cow. La­dy Gaga walks by? Oh, it’s La­dy Gaga with­out her pants again!

Aus­tralia

And Why Are You Snap­ping Pho­tos?

Cowork­er, try­ing to get se­cu­ri­ty card out of pock­et: Why would you stand there and let me un­but­ton my pants when you al­ready had yours out?

Nashville, Ten­nessee

The Cracks Spread With Alarm­ing Ra­pid­i­ty

CSR: Nan­cy had, like, a ner­vous break­down af­ter a phone call that last­ed an hour and a half. I felt bad for her, but it was al­so kin­da cool. It was like watch­ing glass shat­ter.

New­ton, Mass­a­chu­setts

Hah! You Said “In­sert”!

Girl of­fice work­er, point­ing to three-ring binder: Oh! You have a pret­ty pur­ple one!
Male cowork­er: Go ahead and take it.
Girl of­fice work­er: Oh, it?s too small. I need a big pret­ty pur­ple one.
Male cowork­er: In­sert your own joke here.

Philadel­phia, Penn­syl­va­nia

The Wheels in Her Brain Go Round and Round…

28-year-old in­tern: How do you spell your last name?
22-year-old in­tern: “Towne”. You know, like “City” on­ly with an “e”.
28-year-old agent: Don’t you mean like “Town” with an “e”?
22-year-old in­tern: Nope, I mean “City”. But I sup­pose “Town” would work too. I nev­er thought of that.

Min­neapo­lis, Min­neso­ta

Do Boss­es Al­ways Want It Both Ways? Dis­cuss.

IT guy: Yeah, the UI needs to be top-notch. Like the best thing you’ve ever done. Uh, don’t spend too much time on it.

Kirk­land, Wash­ing­ton

Over­heard by: Ralph H