Archive for the ‘Cinema’ Category

Take What, Exactly? No, Don’t Tell Me.

Cute gay guy: Tome Cruise and Katie Holmes were looking for an apartment on my street.
Female coworker: Oh, really?
Cute gay guy: Yeah, I live on Toorak Road. If they move there, I wanna steal Suri. And have crazy bum sex on my balcony! (demonstrates by thrusting in the air) Take that, Scientology!

Melbourne
Australia

Overheard by: Giggling

This Is Just Like That Erin Brockovich Incident

Intern: I wish I could remember Matt Damon’s name in Good Will Hunting…

Santa Fe Building
Denver, Colorado

And If Science Ever Conquers Death, the Pope’s Out of a Job

Writer: You know what I think? I think Jerry Lewis wakes up every morning just scared out of his mind that they’ll actually find a cure for muscular dystrophy.

Scottsdale, Arizona

And It’s Not That I’m a Virgin, I’ve Just Never Been Able to Get Laid

Boss to underling: It’s not that Ender’s Game is Sci-Fi, it’s just set in the future.

Baton Rouge, Louisiana

Overheard by: annoyed office mate

You Had Us at “Smegma Sandwich”

Cubicle #1: That movie was complete donk.
Cubilce #2: You’re a snob. I thought it was fun, and I loved the Roxanne Tango bit.
Cucible #1: Dude, that movie was a smegma sandwich and fuck anyone who says otherwise.
Cubicle #3: Hear, hear.

Chicago, Illinois

Overheard by: still laughing

Did Donald Duck Abuse Huey, Dewey and Louie? Discuss.

Older woman discussing the movie Bambi: Why did they keep calling him “little prince?” And where was his father?
Receptionist: Bucks don’t participate in raising the fawns.
Older woman: That’s so mean!

Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania

Overheard by:

They Couldn’t Find Enough Four-Fingered Actors for the Live-Action Version

Coworker #1: How was The Simpsons Movie?
Coworker #2: Pretty good.
Coworker #1: It’s not the cartoon version, is it?
Coworker #2: Uhh… Yeah.

Navy Yard
Washington, DC

Sit Tight– This Conversation Could Go on All. Friggin. Day.

Intern: You know, Michael Jackson always reminded me of Darth Vader.
Employee: Who?
Intern: From Star Wars.
Employee: Wait, Michael Jackson was in Star Wars?

Pennsylvania

Yours Is the “Lollipop Guild” Song, for No Reason Whatsoever

Cube rat #1: Oh, I love that ringtone! That’s from Wizard of Oz, isn’t it?
Cube rat #2: Yeah, Ding-Dong! The Witch Is Dead is my favorite song in that whole movie.
Cube rat #1: Who called?
Cube rat #2: My mother-in-law.
Cube rat #1, lauhging: Got any others?
Cube rat #2: Yeah, I’ve got If I Only Had a Brain on there, too.
Cube rat #1: Who’s that one for?
Cube rat #2: My boss.

Bossier City, Louisiana

This Conversation Could Be the Beginning Of a Beautiful Friendship.

PA #1: I have a thing for military sci-fi.
PA #2: I mean, who doesn’t?
(later)
PA #1: Predator is a classic. It’s like Casablanca.

Manhattan, New York

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