Archive for the ‘Bosses and Underlings’ Category

9AM Today’s Looking Up

Manager: Will you help him on this issue?
Buyer #1: I’d be happy to help him.

15 minutes pass.

Buyer #2: If you just don’t do your work, they won’t fire you; they’ll
just give it to somebody else.

6808 Lake Worth Boulevard
Fort Worth, Texas

Overheard by: Cube Monkey

The Guy at the Burrito Counter Winked at Me, and I Lost All Control

Frustrated supervisor to quitting employee: And I'll need your password for your computer. Why don't you just give me that now?
Employee, mumbling: It's “Latinomneeee.”
Supervisor: Did you say “Latino E”? I couldn't understand you.
Employee: No, it's “Latino heat.”
(awkward silence)
Employee: I guess I was feeling a little frisky that day.

Brooklyn, New York

Overheard by: ap

Native Americans: Jeez, Even the Bigots Ignore Us!

CEO to new sales rep: Use your judgment when it comes to payment schedules. If they sound like good people — you know, like normal Americans on the phone — we’ll bill them. But Ay-rabs and Orientals pay COD. You have to watch those bastards, ’cause they’ll all fuck you.

1190 North Del Rio Place
Ontario, California

Overheard by: Really glad I gave notice yesterday

Why Simon Says is Only Fun in Kindergarten

Supervisor: Go to your computer and pull up the client file you showed me earlier, the one that was wrong. I need to show it to the IT people.
Worker: I can’t because I deleted it.
Supervisor: Why did you delete it?
Worker: Because you told me to.
Supervisor: Don’t do what I tell you! Do what I say.

Franklin Square
Springfield, Illinois