Underling: These people were home users. We also have data for work users, but they shouldn’t be double-counted in the combined numbers.
Boss: I am definitely going to Taco Bell tonight.
10 Rockefeller Plaza
New York, NY
Overheard by: pixelvisions
Archive for the ‘Bosses and Underlings’ Category
Part of My Deal with the DA’s Office
Secretary: What are they here for?
Boss: They are here to remove my organ.
Secretary: … What?
Fort Street
Lincoln Park, Michigan
…As This Powerpoint Diagram Very Clearly Illustrates.
Boss to underling: I'm okay with someone coming at me from the front. It's when they come from behind that bothers me.
Tysons Corner, Virginia
11AM Filing
Boss: All of these folders need to be filed right away, but I can’t trust the desk guys to do it.
Tutor #1: Isn’t that their job?
Boss: Yes, but they need to be filed alphabetically, and they can’t do that.
Tutor #1: They can’t file alphabetically?
Boss: Apparently not. [Tutor #2] spent two hours yesterday trying to put everything back in order.
Tutor #2, breaking into laughter: Is that what you thought I was doing? Shit!
Boss: What were you doing, then?
Tutor #2: I dropped my ring in the drawer, and I had to take out all the folders to find it! It took forever, too.
Boss: Did you at least put them back alphabetically when you were done?
Tutor $2: Are you on crack? That’s the desk guy’s job!
101 Braddock Road
Frostburg, Maryland
Overheard by: Ren
As I Am
Broker to real estate agent in training: When you’re doing an open house you have to talk to everybody, no matter how poor they look. You know, no matter how black they are… if you’re racist.
Huntington, New York
10AM Cancel New Headset Order
Employee: My headset for my phone doesn’t work. Can I have a new one?
Supervisor: Let me see that. Oh…you see what’s wrong? Sometimes the data can get caught in the phone line…so just straighten the cord. That makes the voice data come through more quickly and it won’t get all caught up.
11161 Mill Valley Road
Omaha, Nebraska
10AM Review
Worker: Can you review this for me?
Manager: Why are you asking me all the time?
Worker: Because you’re my team leader.
Manager: There are no team leaders anymore.
Worker: What? Yes, there are.
Manager: No, there aren’t.
Worker: Well, I asked [Jesse] yesterday, and he said he couldn’t do it because he wasn’t my team leader. Why would he say that if there aren’t team leaders anymore?
Manager: Because he didn’t want to do your review.
137 Iroquois Avenue
Essex Junction, Vermont
What Health Care Crisis?
Employee: How long do I have to work here before I receive health
insurance?
Boss: Oh…Um…We don’t do that here. I know some hospitals that
won’t report you to the credit bureaus, though.
1101 Robin Hill Lane
Bel Air, Maryland
9AM Back to Work
Boss: Did you have a computer ethics class in college?
Programmer: [Scoffs] There is no ethics, it’s a computer.
10 Salt Creek Lane
Hinsdale, Illinois
Overheard by: Bill Dwyer
4PM Work on Report
Office worker: I need to talk to you about this report you mentioned.
Manager: No, we can’t talk about this now, not till tomorrow.
Office worker: Yes, but it’s due tomorr–
Manager: No, no, no! Now is not the time to talk about it. Tomorrow is.
Office worker: But–
Manager: Tomorrow. Goodbye.
39 Murray Street
Hobart, Tasmania
Australia