Archive for the ‘Bosses and Underlings’ Category

I Sug­gest You Glue Your Ass to Your Own Chair

Of­fice drone #1: What’s a fun­nier prank — if I tape the the re­ceiv­er to the boss’s phone, or if I fix it so she can’t open the draw­er?
Of­fice drone #2: Um, maybe you should… [looks point­ed­ly at re­turn­ing boss be­hind drone #1].
Of­fice drone #1: I know! I’ll glue her cof­fee mug to her desk. Bitch’ll be spew­ing!
Boss, stand­ing right be­hind drone #1: Bitch is be­hind you.

Har­ris Street
Pyr­mont, Syd­ney
Aus­tralia

Over­heard by: get back to work!

He’d Rather Do It Av­o­ca­tion­al­ly

Man­ag­er: Why do they send so much of this stock? It’s nev­er gonna sell. What bunch of ar­se­holes thought this up at head of­fice?
Pe­on: This is re­al­ly get­ting to you, is­n’t it? I get the feel­ing you ap­plied for a job there, and they turned you down.
Man­ag­er: A job at head of­fice? No thanks, I’ve no de­sire to be an ar­se­hole for a liv­ing.
Pe­on: But you’d be so good at it.

4 The Sid­ings
Lin­coln, Unit­ed King­dom

12PM Fol­low Up with Buy­er

Man­ag­er: Did you get a re­sponse back from that email you sent to the buy­er yet?
Co-work­er: No; I did­n’t ask her for one. She knew what ac­tion I took and if she did­n’t agree with me, she can call me.
Man­ag­er: No, no. You should al­ways in­clude “please ad­vise” in the email, in case they don’t re­ceive the email.

8000 Bent Branch Dri­ve
Irv­ing, Texas