30-something coworker, happily: So they tell me it's herpes in my eye. I know! They've given me Zovirax for it.
ProRail
Utrecht
Belgium
Overheard by: Thomas van Alphen
Archive for the ‘Body Parts’ Category
By Wiping It on the Coffee Area?
Convenience store worker #1: This coffee area is a mess.
Convenience store worker #2, at cash register: I just cleaned my butt off on Sunday.
Grand Rapids, Michigan
Overheard by: Rob W
Needless to Say, the White one is Whole Foods
Classmate #1: I’m gonna shave your head and sell your hair on the black market!
Classmate #2: Why would black people want his hair?
Classmate #3, after laughter subsides: Where is the black market, anyway?
Mt. Vernon High School
Mt. Vernon, Texas
You're Gonna Love Unix
Specialist to data entry rep: Reboot your system and then send in a testicle service request.
Central, Illinois
Overheard by: Mrs. D
Um, It’s a Bible
Coworker to another holding book: Go to the vagina page!
Christmas party
Richfield, Minnesota
Like, Why Were You Touching It with Your Penis?
Agent #1: Dude, I haven't talked to you in forever.
Agent #2: Man, you get weirded out all the time.
Agent #1: Me!? I never get weirded out, man.
Agent #2: What about that time I touched your ear?
Agent #1: Yeah, that was weird.
Ontario
Canadia
Why Gay Porn Stars Are So Healthy
Gay hairstylist: But people who have anal don't get prostrate cancer…
Manager: They only get hemorrhoids.
Gay hairstylist: That's true, after a while it looks like a cauliflower. But, anyway, we do not get prostate cancer, because the cock acts like a massage therapist.
Manager: Riiiiight!
Sao Paulo
Brazil
Maybe Not So Much Teeth Next Time?
Coworker to another, about bus driver: I couldn't even get it out of my mouth before he started bellowing.
Swiftwater, Pennsylvania
You Seem to Be Missing My Point Deliberately
Senior editor: I know! I could sue the company. I injured my toenail at a company event. What do you think loss of a toenail is worth?
Writer: I don't know. See what they're selling for on eBay.
Renton, Washington
…Thankfully That's in This Season.
Coworker, after being asked several times if she likes a coworker's new shoes: No, they're ugly like your face.
Missoula, Montana