Communications manager: He said your box is boring.
Graphics designer: He said my box is what?
Webmaster: You have a boring box?
Graphics designer: I’ve never had complaints before.
Sensual Products Office
Las Vegas, Nevada
Overheard by: sensual products copywriter
Repair tech: My customer just called in and told me that his trans-vaginal probe is vibrating.
Cube dweller: And that’s a problem because…?
Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
HR assistant: So, Paul*, when are you gonna take a look at my thing? I’m bursting at the seams, right?
Paul the safety director: [laughing] I can’t look now — and will never look at your thing.
HR assistant: But, dang it! I need some space! Look at how my file cabinets are overflowing!!
Paul: HR isn’t the only department that needs filing space!
HR assistant: [sighs] I just need someone to look and to care!
4730 South Fort Apache
Las Vegas, Nevada
Overheard by: Corporate Paralegal
College secretary: George loved my dip!
College rep: He also likes penis.
Syracuse, New York
Overheard by: it’s true
Secretary, poking head into crowded conference room: Has anybody seen Mike Hunt?
Houston, Texas
Overheard by: Coffee out of my nose…
Coworker: King Tut’s tomb didn’t make you sick, moron, it was eating all the testicles!
Dayton, Ohio
Female coworker: That’s it. I’m going to the store and get some tampons. I’m tired of stuffing toilet paper in me.
Charlottesville, Virginia
Convenience store worker #1: This coffee area is a mess.
Convenience store worker #2, at cash register: I just cleaned my butt off on Sunday.
Grand Rapids, Michigan
Overheard by: Rob W
Products VP: Everyone who makes this crap is just as fucked as we are.
Finance VP: If only no one put this in their mouths…
Elmsford, New York
Overheard by: Bored Beyond Belief
Broker #1: Okay, here’s one: would you rather lick the bulge on Jimmy’s leg or eat the skin that Richard peeled off his foot last year?
Broker #2: As sick as this sounds, I’d take Jimmy’s bulge in a second. I had to sit next to Richard. His foot had a crack in it so deep you could stick a pencil in it.
Chicago, Illinois
Hat Tip 🎩 to The Marketing Scientist
