Well, At That Point a Small Night Demon Gets Onto a Treadmill Under the Hood…

Dude: If you really want to save money on gas then you should get a hybrid car.
Chick: Hybrid? Does that mean it runs on electricity?
Dude: Uh…yeah
Chick: Well what happens when the sun goes down?

317 West Main Cross Street
Findlay, Ohio

Overheard by: Crut

In My Defense, I Also Talk about Sex All Day Long

Chick: Dude, you’re such a poser. You talk about food all day long and then go home and eat salad. You’re not a real fatty like me. Talk to me when you join the club.

500 West 4^th Street
Winston-Salem, North Carolina

It’s My Fitness Program

Female co-worker: Yeah, these bruises on my legs? I wish I could say they were from S&M. Actually, I was just drunkenly stumbling around.

33 New Montgomery Street
San Francisco, California

Overheard by: McN

Let’s Go Rob an Ann Taylor First

Ghetto chick: Girl, I don’t want to rob a grocery store lookin’ like this.

McDade’s
Jackson, Mississippi

Put a Nice Potted Plant on It?

Fashion designer girl #1: I really want a bookshelf, but I don’t have any books.
Fashion designer girl #2: Maybe you could get a short one and paint it white.

8360 Melrose Avenue
West Hollywood, California

And What Is That Bright Object in the Sky?

Pale girl: Look at these freckles on the back of my hand. Oh, my — what is this dark ring?!
Smoker: That’s called a tan.

130 East Randolph Street
Chicago, Illinois

My Eyes Shut Off If I Exceed My Quota

Man: Is that a real rugby shirt or one of those trendy fake ones?
Woman: It’s a trendy one. It’s Ralph Lauren. Can’t you read the r. F.I. C.?
Man: Well I didn’t want to stare… I stare enough already!

Georgetown, Kentucky

Oh, Sorry, the Thingamajig Was Fubarred By the Whatzit and Corrupted Your Jimmyjam

Tech guy: Yeah, so I tried to open the file, and it said something, something, file can’t open, something.
Client services girl: Gee, thanks, tech.

1619 Broadway
New York, New York

PETA May Have Gone Too Far This Time

Bimbette coworker: They’re gonna skin your mother-in-law and give it to a zebra!

860 Broadway
New York, New York

Overheard by: Confabulation Nation

2PM Waiting Room

Girl #1: I use the pull and pray method.
Girl #2: Girl, pull and pray…they never do it. It doesn’t work.
Girl #1: Yes it does! It just doesn’t work ninety percent of the time.

45 Broadway
New York, New York

Overheard by: not dating either of them