Chick on cell, going to see her dad at work: Not shaving my legs is my chastity belt — now I can get drunk and not be a slut.
Main Street
Dallas, Texas
Overheard by:
Chick on cell, going to see her dad at work: Not shaving my legs is my chastity belt — now I can get drunk and not be a slut.
Main Street
Dallas, Texas
Overheard by:
Blonde: I’m queen of the Gentiles!
Owings Mills, Maryland
Office bimbette #1: So, I bought a new car last night and I didn’t need a guy to help me pick it out or make the deal or anything.
Office bimbette #2: For reals? What kind did of car did you get?
Office bimbette #1: A blue one.
California Street
San Francisco, California
Office girl #1: I want to start reading more books.
Office girl #2: Didn’t you just read yesterday?
11940 Jollyville Road
Austin, Texas
Guy: That’s because you broke it!
Hot blonde: I know, I totally put it in the wrong hole.
Guy: You should be more careful.
Hot blonde: I added more liquid, but I get no smoke.
Guy: Did you make sure to re-insert the thingie?
80 Grasslands Avenue
Elmsford, New York
Overheard by: Bored Beyond Belief
White rich girl leaving mall with friends: I am so much more gangsta than you!
Mall
Des Moines, Iowa
Overheard by: Am I Really in Iowa?
Co-worker #1: I don’t really like music.
Co-worker #2: Oh, yeah?
Co-worker #1: I think there are only 200 good songs in the history of the world.
Co-worker #2: And the rest are crap?
Co-worker #1: Well…they are no good. I have downloaded 130 of the 200 from the net, but the others are too hard to find.
Co-worker #2: Ohhhhkay.
2300 Prospect Road
Fort Collins, Colorado
Tween girl #1, going through underwear: Oh my God, so I could, like, totally get the blue ones and wear them on school spirit day!
Tween girl #2: Totally!
Victoria’s Secret
Bellevue, Washington
Overheard by: Becky
Worker: Crap. It’s Wednesday afternoon and I already have Friday brain.
842 South 2nd Street
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Chick to coworker: Ohhh, okay. Maybe she should stop getting f‑ed in the nose. It’s only gonna make her uglier.
Upper West Side
New York, New York
Hat Tip 🎩 to The Marketing Scientist