Guy #1: If you lost my knife, so help me god you owe me $14.99. Plus ship­ping and han­dling.
Guy #2: Okay, so…we’ll just deduct that from the eighty bucks you al­ready owe me?
Guy #1: Statute of lim­i­ta­tions. That bet was, like, five months ago.
Guy #2: Yeah, and we agreed that you’d owe me in­ter­est if you did­n’t pay me…
Guy #1 (in­cred­u­lous): In­ter­est? Was I *drunk*?
Guy #2: Well, it was at 8 am on a Tues­day. So you nev­er know.

Stam­ford, Con­necti­cut

Over­heard by: Dave Eu­gene